He sat in a corner of is room, his legs up to his chest, his arms around them.
His gaze fixed on the bed. His bed. That bed.
He couldn't decide what to do.
Stay here?
Useless.
Go and find him then?
Useless too.

Finally his lover must have been right, maybe he was just a coward…maybe…

Stay here? But he'll be right then…
Go and do what I've said? But he'll be mad at me and even if I prove that I'm not a coward, he'll leave me and I'll be alone…

So he stood here he was, still glaring at the bed. His bed. That bed.

*****

The Shohoku Basketball team was at practice. Hard practice.
But as hard and tiring as the said practice was, the captain's thoughts were elsewhere…

I wonder if he would have enough guts to come [a little scornful laugh] No I guess…

And he returned to practice …it was far more important than…him…
After all, it was not as if he would really come…he was too much of a coward to come here and did what he had said…

*****

He must be at practice now…
He must be thinking about anything else but me now…

He was still looking at the bed. His bed. That bed. And he still didn't know what to do. Go or stay?

I crave to go and see him, show him…But if he leaves me after that, what would I do??

He was on the verge of crying now. But the matter was still the same: he couldn't decide what to do…

If I stay here, without moving, he will come. He will open the front door with the key I gave him once. He'll let his sport bag and his shoes downstairs, and then he'll come here.
If he had a bad day, he'll just undress me, take me, and go away. Only difference between me and a whore: he never pays me.
But if practice wasn't too tiring, and if that stupid redhead didn't annoy him too much, he'll take his time, be patient and gentle, and maybe stay a little after…

He couldn't help but fix the bed and think about rare caresses, few kisses and blush, just a little…

Maybe…maybe he'll stay…we could just…cuddle a little…

And once again, his eyes went on the bed. His bed. That bed…

*****

Practice was over. He was tired but satisfied: the team was stronger everyday.

He went in the locker, took a shower, changed his clothes, took his bag and went out. Then he hesitated.

Right, my home, left, his…

He chose right.

*****

He couldn't stop staring, as if it would made him appear.
He couldn't keep his eyes away from the bed. Mots important peace of furniture in the room.
His bed. His, always his. He had known it since that first time , at Shohoku. The way he had treated him, looked at him, touched him…His lover had made it clear that he was just a kind of hobby and nothing more. A hobby meant all the fun without the complications or the bad sides.

That's why it's always my sheets that are strained, and never his.

Wonderful, now he was ironic. But how couldn't he be??
That bed. Where he was the cheap whore, no one had feelings for, no one cared about. That bed where he humiliated himself, when his lover…But he knew he couldn't do anything else, cause even if his lover didn't care a bit, he did.

Why? Why didn't he come tonight? I didn't do anything wrong…

He did his best not to fall asleep. Maybe he was just late, maybe he would come, even that late…But finally, tiredness won, and he slept on the floor, in the dark corner of his room.

*****

I bet he expected me to come…It's been two days already…I wonder how long he will be able to resist the urge of begging me to warm his bed again…Humph!! I'm looking forward to it, cause he'll have to literally crawl at my feet if he wants me to do him even just once…It will teach him a good lesson: I'm sure he will be a good boy after that…

Proud of himself, as always.
He entered the class, as if there was nothing. And in a way, it was it. Just casual sex, nothing less, nothing more.

*****

I must…stop…I know it. It would be better…for both of us but…

Two weeks now since that fateful day.

His lover didn't come to see him. He didn't sleep in his bed either. That bed meant too much, kept too much memories. It was far better to sleep on the floor.

He was about to do so, in that dark corner of his room when he heard it. It was just a soft sound but he knew it oh-so well to have misheard it: that key that didn't fit exactly in the lock, cause it was just a copy, and that made that particular sound when it opened it.
His lover was downstairs.
Soft footsteps pounded in the stairs.
His hand on the doorknob.
He opened it.
He was furious. Then, just angry and surprised when he saw him on the floor.

"- You came…"

Barely a whisper.

"- Yeah, yeah, whatever…Now I'm here so…"

His lover gave him a meaningful grin.
He sat up. Better stood up for that special kind of thing.
His lover grin's grew wider and became lustful…

Hard to get rid of old habit it seems…

"- Please…Not that bad for a beginning…leave."

Everything.
His lover would have expected everything from him: apologies, begging even, to be taken here and now, but certainly not that.

"- N-nani??
"- Please… leave…

His voice was calmer than ever.
It hurt, more than everything had hurt before, but it has to be done.

"- Demo…

Tatsuhiko made his way to the door. He couldn't stay here, couldn't see him leave...
When he passed Takenori… Barely a whisper, again. But loud enough to be heard.

"- Leave…now…

…and he exited the room.

~* The end *~

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